15 April 2009

Purpose in Life~

I had a great talk with great friend from down south, who came up for a holiday! Now that it been couple days but letting his words sink in! Being able to just tell my story for the last 8 months to him felt good, not all has been great but there are praises and things!

To put things short, I ain't going to tell ppls here, what are my stresses which are causing me to lose a lot of sleep. But he asked me "What is your purpose in life that God has put you here for?" I couldn't answer, I don't have a clue. 

Is working in job of aviation going to satisfy me, I don’t think it will, there are many thing I might need to sacrifice. How am I able to glorify God through aviation? I have no idea, I am confused so much, yet I am 70% done in my course.

So until i can find out the purpose of my life on this earth that God has given me, I'll be just wandering with out a purpose and all is meaning less!

I also told him I haven't been able to trust God 100% because all the crap is happening around me because I wanted to be in control, but that means pride is stopping me! Instead of God being the Captain of my ship, I want to take charge, meaning I am still relying on myself rather than God. 

But what does trust mean he asked me. I thought about it and gave him an answer but he replied back. "Trusts mean that God's sovereignty is always good to me". Letting it sink, I realise that is true. We always think that everything should be good and smooth in our lives when we have God in our lives. But when we think when our life has gone downhill we don’t think that God has been just to us, we doubt, we ask why.  But in reality it all about realising God is always good to me no matter what is the key!

So I have been pondering about what is my purpose on this earth is, yet I still can’t figure it out yet I need to learn to trust that he is good to me.

Hopefully I can be able to figure it out soon, but i think it will be a long while.